As Peter entered his home, Cornelius fell at his feet and worshiped him. 26 But Peter pulled him up and said, “Stand up! I’m a human being just like you!” Acts 10:25-26
Today, July 9th, will be a day of mixed emotions for our family.
First of all, it is Jany’s birthday. She would have been 63-years-young today. But instead of celebrating her born-day her on earth, she is having a grand celebration with Jesus in heaven.
As I knew this day was just around the corner from the day of her passing, it wasn’t long after June 3rd that I already had a plan as to what I would journal about today. But, of course, God’s plan was even better.
You see, Jany and I wore the same size shoes. So when I didn’t have a pair of shoes to match the dress I was going to wear to her funeral, I slipped into her closet and grabbed the perfect pair of taupe colored sandals. When I slipped them on my feet, the saying, “I’ve got some big shoes to fill” came to my mind. I didn’t say anything right away to anyone about whose shoes I was wearing. Then throughout the evening, those shoes gave me a sense of pride and comfort. When the conversation led to my attire, I was happy to inform anyone that I was wearing Jany’s shoes.
Then, two days later when we traveled to Kentucky for the graveside service, again I wore a pair of Jany’s shoes. I had brought my own black shoes, but they truly are not the most comfortable heels to wear. I rummaged through her shoes in her Kentucky closet and tried on her simple black pumps. They fit perfectly! Again, I didn’t make a big deal about it. I did tell my daughter and husband, and each of us got a smile on our faces.
It wasn’t long after returning from Kentucky that we had to start going through her personal belongings back here in Florida. She had old shoes, new shoes, shoes barely worn, and shoes that no one would want to put on.
Isn’t this just like life? Some of Jany’s “old shoes” were still in good condition. These remind me of the traditions that have been in the family for years, and there’s not a thing wrong with them, and they will continue. The traditions won’t be the same without her, but these memories will be comforting to our souls. Old shoes in good condition are comfy and will still be used. Long live the traditions, maybe with a twist at times.
“New shoes”. Just this past Christmas Jany had wanted a new pair of tennis shoes. Now these shoes couldn’t be just any kind. They had to be white, maybe a hint of pink, and either one of two name brands. So Tim and I searched for the right pair of tennis shoes and finally found them. This task wasn’t as easy as one would think, but it was done. These “new shoes” remind me of the new tasks before me as one of the two women in the family (my sister-in-law, Kristin, being the other). Holly has already mentioned that I’ve got to prepare the turkey for Thanksgiving now. When I replied, “We’ll just let dad fry it” she gave me a look of “Are you kidding me????” We all got a good laugh. So, guess who’s going to be preparing the turkey this year? Yep, this chic. I’m sure I’ll enlist the help of Tim and Holly. Ha! We think that Jany was picky (precise) in things, that trait didn’t fall far from the tree. Tim and Holly are the perfect ones to “oversee” the turkey making process.
Why the thought “I’ve got some big shoes to fill”? When Jany did things, she did them right. Her walk with God was close. Her love for her family was unmistakable. (You don’t mess with her babies.) Her zest for life was cautious yet enjoyable. Her loyalty to her family, friends, and God were admirable.
Earlier I mentioned how God had a better plan. This morning when I sat down to read my scriptures I prayed as I always do and said, “Lord, please speak to me and through me. Give me the words You want me to share with all.” Then I went to my church’s website. They hadn’t updated the scripture reading from yesterday. So since I didn’t read Acts from yesterday, I started there. God gave me Acts 10:25-26. If I were to put her on a pedestal I could hear her saying like Peter said, “Stand up! I’m a human being just like you!” Yes, God created us all equal and in His own image. We don’t need to put anyone on a pedestal or worship them. We need to worship God and God alone. But I did, and still do, admire the lady whose shoes I’ll be occasionally wearing.
Can I fill them? Yes. Can I replace her? No way!
I also mentioned earlier how today is a day of mixed emotions:
- My father-in-law closed on his new home today. (Congratulations, Wayne!)
- Cole starts his middle school activities already by attending archery practice today. (Have fun, Cole!)
- This afternoon we are attending my sweet friends’ father’s funeral. (Praying for Kim, David, Mrs. Edison, and families) (See Comfort and Peace Through Birds about Kim.)
- Sending love and birthday wishes to my dear neighbor, Mrs. Catherine.
So mixed emotions? Yes. But you know what? Through it all I must remember Psalm 118:24, “This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.”
Blessings and God’s abundant love to y’all.
