A dose of respect, the future, and appreciation are what I’ve been learning this Christmas season through my mom.
Over the past few years my mother has had numerous surgeries on both knees and shoulders, and almost each had complications involved afterwards. Mom’s arthritis is painful in most joints. Her mobility isn’t what it used to be, but her independence is still as strong as ever. Nowadays it’s just difficult for her to be as mobile and flexible as she would desire to be. (She is getting stronger through exercise, and will continue. I have complete confidence in her and her determination.)
I’ve had to have some “come to Jesus” meetings with her regarding her desires for all holiday decorations and entertaining. I’ve even unintentionally made her cry. (Ya, ya, all those who know my mom are like, “What are you thinking making your sweet mother cry!?”) I was just trying to be realistic for the here-and-now. In all actuality, through it all, God was having a “come to Jesus” meeting with me.
My children (Hunter, Holly, and Cole) have even all had a huge hand in helping prepare the grandparent’s home for Christmas. It has been through their assistance that God began working in me.
I see and hear of them pulling out the many storage containers, unpacking and unraveling each piece of Christmas past, putting together tall trees and decorating them to perfection, and displaying décor in the appropriate place for their nana. My heart overflows. It’s not only my heart, but my mom and step-dad’s as well. I can see it in mom and Carol’s faces and hear it in their voices.
One of God’s Ten Commandments is for us to honor our mother and father.

“Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.” Exodus 20:12

We also are instructed to do so in the books of Deuteronomy, Matthew, Mark Luke, and Ephesians.
When the decorating process began I was doing it out of respect, but my attitude was at times that of a teenage girl rolling her eyes with each decoration that was being taken out of a storage box to be displayed in some nook or cranny. I was thinking, “The more we take out, the more I have to put back.” Selfishness had settled in. As each keepsake was being unraveled my mother would have a story to tell about where it came from, or when she made it, or where she displays it each year. With every piece my heartstrings were pulled.
My attitude of “teenage” respect, became more of an honor. Each time I’d glance at my own teenagers’ faces, they did not have the look of disgust or “now what”, but one out of selfishness and humility. I’d even sees grins come across their faces. Another heartstring was pulled.

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” ¹⁴ Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. ¹⁵ Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.” ¹⁶ As it is, you boast in your arrogant schemes. All such boasting is evil. James 4:13-16

Throughout the decorating experience I kept being reminded how short life is, how memories are so important and treasured, and how I want my own children and grandchildren to remember me one day. Much like my mother, my late mother-in-law loved Christmas time. I could hear her even giving me words of wisdom to be respectful to my mother and to cherish each precious ornamentation being placed around the home. Life is short. So suck up your selfish desires and embrace the time with your loving family now. We don’t know what tomorrow will bring, so do everything as if it is for the Lord and enjoy each breath.

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant ⁵ or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; ⁶ it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

I LOVE my momma! How can I have an attitude of “impatience” and” irritability” when my momma taught me better? She raised me to be a God-fearing, loving Christian lady. One who needs to obey and respect what God has to teach me. God informs us that love is patient and kind. It is not rude nor irritable and resentful, but rejoices, tolerates, believes, and hopes all things. More heartstrings were being tugged and a good whoopin’ was felt by the Almighty’s hand.
So, instead of helping my loving parents in this “dependent” season in their lives with resentment, I’ve grown to do it with honor, forth-thinking, and an appreciation for them and every little piece of Christmas the is displayed all around their home.
Christmas and entertaining family is so important to my mom. I don’t want to steal her joy. It’s not about me and the time it took. I want my children and all their kids and grands and great-grands to remember how much nana and grandpa love Christmas. I hope that nana will continue to share her stories about “I made this when….” Or “So-and-so gave this to me when…” and with each story of the past she shares, we are making new memories each year that will be told time and again one day.
So, Parker and Bassett lineage…cherish nana and grandpa’s: snowman bathroom, the kitchen Christmas tree, the girlie-angel tree, all nana’s angels being displayed, the grandchildren tree in the family room that parades each of your photographs, the old keepsake ornaments on the sunroom Christmas tree, the beautifully nana-painted nativity, tree, and other plentiful décor around the home, and most of all…cherish family.
I get it. I get it mentally and honestly. Confession…my home is decorated in every room as well. (Thanks, mom. I hope that I’m just like you in your love for Christmas and family.)
I pray many blessings and much JOY for you! Have a wonderful day. – Stephanie