You are about to read the sixth entry in a series titled “Purity”, specifically virginity. First of all, thank you for reading and sharing this topic that is so prevalent and needed to be discussed in our society. As with all entries in this series, I would encourage you to read before sharing with a young person. Today’s topic is regarding oral sex.
I am a sixth grade teacher at a middle school. I unfortunately hear and see the temptations, acts, and body language students (as young as the age of twelve!) deal with. My heart aches each time I hear of these young people delving into sexual activity. Parents, although some children/teens are innocent themselves, some of their friends may not be. The conversations are ones that should not be even in their casual vocabulary.
This type of conversation may not be one that you have with your middle school child; that is totally up to you. But, don’t be oblivious in thinking that they haven’t heard about oral sex or aren’t curious about it. I would encourage you to talk with your son and/or daughter and let them know the effects of any type of sex.
I’m praying for you all.
If this is the first entry you’ve read in this “Purity” series, here’s a brief synopsis: These are stories from readers of all ages and stages, virgins and non-virgins before marriage, some who are not married yet and others who have been married for decades, etc.. Whatever the case may be, their testimonies have been turned in to letters to their younger self.
Now here’s the sixth “Letter to my younger self”:
Dear younger me,
Yes, you remain a virgin until marriage, if you are talking about intercourse. I got into oral sex, thinking it was all cool and that I was still a “virgin”. I was also ashamed to ever admit that I was a real-sexual-intercourse-kind-of-virgin. Why was I ashamed? Because if I admitted that I was a virgin, I would have been looked down on, or people would wonder what was wrong with me. I also chose to not have intercourse because I did not want to get pregnant.
While I went through this process for years, I didn’t think that it affected me. Then I began to think about STDs. What’s even crazier to me is that I was still living the Christian life. Yes, you are a church going girl.
When I met my spouse, it was then that I realized that I felt used up. I felt dirty. I didn’t feel as beautiful on the inside as I should, especially for a “Christian” girl.
I’ve discovered that ANY type of sexual activity before marriage is a sin against God, myself, and my future spouse.
I want to warn you and say, “Wait, wait, wait! Sex is something very very special and precious. It is a precious and holy gift that you will be glad you shared with only that one person. Wait in EVERY sexual way. Wait!”
Not only is sex physical, but it is something spiritual, mental, emotional, and more. It is oneness between two people, and a very godly experience.
Today I thank God for having mercy on me. The memories of those past experiences have stayed with me, and I do not desire that for you. Stay pure and true to your Christian faith and what the bible tells you.
“That is the way we should live, because God’s grace has come. That grace can save everyone. 12 It teaches us not to live against God and not to do the bad things the world wants to do. It teaches us to live on earth now in a wise and right way—a way that shows true devotion to God.” Titus 2:11-12
“Let there be no sexual immorality, impurity, or greed among you. Such sins have no place among God’s people.” Ephesians 5:3
“Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” Hebrews 13:4
With deepest respect,
Your older and wiser self
For more information on oral sex in and outside of marriage please visit: http://www.gotquestions.org/Bible-oral-sex.html
