Christmas Time…traditions and changes

Christmas time is here

To me, Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year. A bit cliche sounding, yet so true.

For me, it’s the time when all my family is together. My brothers who live out of state, along with their children and families, come home for Christmas to join the rest of us Floridians.  Extra beds and couches are used. Late nights ensue. Too much food is consumed. Lots of laughter feels the air. Hugs are tightly given. “I love you” is often said. It’s not about the gifts that may be exchanged, it’s about the quality time together.

For us, the family grows a little more each year. Children get married, babies are born, and family friends often accompany us.

For me, my calendar is cleared and marked with the words “FAMILY” for the entire weekend before Christmas. Family and faith…ahhh the sights and sounds of CHRISTmas radiate through our homes.

With each year that passes, something changes.  Traditions may change. A new recipe is introduced. The attendance of loved ones is altered. Our Florida weather is definitely varying. Change can bring about excitement, reflection, sadness, joy, tears, and/or laughter. The emotions that change conjures is definitely a mixed bag of reaction.

I remember as a little girl always alternating Christmas Day between our home and my cousins’ home. When my parents began their divorce procedure…tradition changed.

I remember the Christmas Eve festivities my husband’s family did every year since he was born, and I was sixteen. Santa would come deliver gifts to the children and young adults who weren’t married, and there was always tons of fun filling the quaint old home on the lake. Tim’s mom would always gather the little children around to dramatically tell the Christmas story from the book of Luke, with the nativity scene as props. When Jany went to be with Jesus, we only had one Christmas Eve gathering together before the tradition was no longer. The emotions that welled up within me and Tim…so heartbreaking.

When my mother remarried, all of us grown children and our extensions would celebrate Christmas the weekend before Christmas at their home.  Mom had three boys and a girl whom were all married, and most with kids, and Carol (my step-dad) had three boys and one girl as well who were in and around our same ages and situations. Our family has grown considerably over these years with precious great grandchildren crawling and running around, and joining in on the wadded up wrapping paper fights that always ensue.  After about 26 years of Christmases at nana and grandpa’s festive home, things will be changing.  They have sold their home, simplifying their lifestyle, and possibly moving out of state. Change happens.

I remember each Christmas evening our family would gather at Tim’s parents’ home.  Christmas music filled the air while we assembled around the dinner table, and the classic movies “It’s a Wonderful LIfe” or “A Christmas Carol” with George C. Scott were played on the television during present opening time. After Jany’s passing, Tim and I began hosting Christmas dinner.  Many of the same activities would continue, but the loss of a loved one changed the dynamics drastically. Change happens.

This year was no different. When Tim’s dad suddenly went to be with Jesus a couple of months ago, we knew Christmas would look and be different, but we weren’t sure how.

In our outdoor kitchen area, Tim had me write the words to a Jimmy Buffett song,

We’ve gotta roll with the punches

Learn to play all of our hunches

Makin’ the best of whatever comes your way

Forget that blind ambition

And learn to trust your intuition

Plowin’ straight ahead come what may

And there’s a cowboy in the jungle

Well…that is exactly how this Christmas did appear…we rolled with the punches.

God knew exactly what needed to happen.

This year, our Christmas Eve wasn’t surrounded by Santa calling out the names of children to come open a gift, or family gathered around.  No, things changed.  We had friends come join us at church for a peaceful candlelight service.  Afterwards, we had more friends convene at our home for food, fun, fireside chats, and festivities.  Earlier in the afternoon, one of my “other sons” called to ask if he could come down with his mom and new growing family to stay the night and spend Christmas with us. Yes! Our friends are family.  It was a joyous night. Someone even commented that we just may have a new tradition.

God knew.  He knew exactly who we needed to be surrounded by on this different Christmas Eve and day.  God knew that numerous conversations about Jesus were going to occur to be of good witness and encouragement to others.  God knew that seeing little Jayden open his gifts on Christmas morning was a blessings to us.  God knew that we were going to be just fine because He is with us.

Jesus was given the name Emanuel.  Emanuel means God with us. Instead of our family opening gifts first thing Christmas morning, we waited until late in the afternoon to have just our family of five time together. Before gifts were distributed, God put on my heart to share with my family the following:

In the sixth month of Elizabeth’s pregnancy, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a village in Galilee, to a virgin named Mary. She was engaged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of King David. Gabriel appeared to her and said, “Greetings, favored woman! The Lord is with you! ” Confused and disturbed, Mary tried to think what the angel could mean. “Don’t be afraid, Mary,” the angel told her, “for you have found favor with God! You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you will name him Jesus. He will be very great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his ancestor David. And he will reign over Israel forever; his Kingdom will never end!” Mary asked the angel, “But how can this happen? I am a virgin.” The angel replied, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the baby to be born will be holy, and he will be called the Son of God. What’s more, your relative Elizabeth has become pregnant in her old age! People used to say she was barren, but she has conceived a son and is now in her sixth month. For the word of God will never fail. ” Mary responded, “I am the Lord’s servant. May everything you have said about me come true.” And then the angel left her. Luke 1:26-38 NLT

At that time the Roman emperor, Augustus, decreed that a census should be taken throughout the Roman Empire. (This was the first census taken when Quirinius was governor of Syria.) All returned to their own ancestral towns to register for this census. And because Joseph was a descendant of King David, he had to go to Bethlehem in Judea, David’s ancient home. He traveled there from the village of Nazareth in Galilee. He took with him Mary, to whom he was engaged, who was now expecting a child. And while they were there, the time came for her baby to be born. She gave birth to her firstborn son. She wrapped him snugly in strips of cloth and laid him in a manger, because there was no lodging available for them. Luke 2:1-7

Notice in these verses how Mary was confused and disturbed. She was afraid.  An unexpected change was occurring in her life and she didn’t have the normal emotions of joyous expectancy for her approaching wedding day. She even questioned how and why. These were not her plans. But God.  God had a plan.  He had a plan and we read several times that “God will” throughout the above verses.  No matter what change was taking place in Mary and Joseph’s life, God was with them.

After her acceptance of God’s plan, when she gave birth to Jesus, the conditions were not what she probably would have planned for the delivery of her first born.  Nope.  A long and rugged ride through across country, on a donkey’s back, with no place to stay, was not what she had planned.  No family or friends to help her or bring food after the deliver. No comfy bed to lay her head. But God.  God brought his Son into this world in the most humble conditions.  No matter how she and Joseph were feeling, God was with them. Truly with them! And all was okay…more than okay.

The past few months has not been what our family was expecting to spend the holidays.  But God.  God knew that even at Thanksgiving time, our home would be welcoming to friends where therapeutic and godly conversations took place.  God knew that on Christmas Eve Jesus would be exemplified in chatter. God knew that being with our “other son” and his little one would be refreshing.  Seeing Christmas through the eyes of a child is priceless.  God knew that we would have our time alone together.  And all was okay…more than okay.

When the evening came, gifts were open, dinner was consumed, and the stillness filled the night Tim and I looked into each other’s eyes, embraced one another, and said, “We just have to roll with the punches.”

We are looking forward to new traditions to come and for a refreshing 2020.

No matter what…God is with us, and He is with you. I have friends who are experiencing their first holiday time without a loved one…I am praying for you.  Friends who are going through a different season in their lives…I am praying for you and yours.  Whatever changes have or are happening in your life, please find comfort in Emanuel.  He will never leave you and will bring you much peace and joy while you learn to navigate through life, and while rolling with the punches life brings.

Have a beautiful and more than okay holiday season.

Blessings to you and yours,

Stephanie